I must preface this article by saying: You are magnificent, stupendous and just plain fabulous, just you case you haven’t heard that today. But maybe you aspire to give yourself a personal tune-up, which is quite reasonable, considering that nobody on this Earth is perfect!
But how do you go about doing that – you certainly can’t go from a shrinking Violet to astonishing Amaryllis overnight. But you can start taking steps to get there, and here is my simple three-step program for you to read at your greatest convenience.
But as an aside, make sure the reason you want to do this is for yourself. If you’re doing this for someone else, not only will you be unfulfilled, you’ll have to struggle trying to act like a person that you aren’t. For your peace of mind, please pump the brakes and put the car in park before that goes any further. Trading who you are for someone else’s approval is never worth it, even if it seems that way at first.
Step 1: Evaluate
How are you going to move forward if you have no idea where you’re trying to go? Who is your ideal you? Then, think deeply about what you want from yourself. One of the most effective ways for me is to identify somebody that I really admire and consider what makes them so awesome to me.
Do you admire RuPaul for his charisma, uniqueness, nerve and talent – and those entrances he makes that bring down the house?
Maybe you admire Eleanor Roosevelt, for her diplomacy, wisdom and tireless work for equality and all around awesomeness?
Perhaps you fancy yourself somewhere in the middle or somewhere completely different. Who knows, it’s up to you! Make a list of some traits you’d like to incorporate into your day-to-day life, and you can make them as reasonable or outrageous as you’d like. Do you want to be more intergalactic? Go for it.
Step 2: Make a list.
What does a _________ person do, anyway? Even if you have no idea, throw whatever you’re thinking of on a piece of paper.
If you’re aspiring to be more outgoing and social, maybe upping your cocktail party game would be on the list. Brave? Maybe you’d tackle something scary like skydiving. If you’re seeking to be more open-minded, perhaps you would list things that you’ve never tried before, like scuba diving or bhangra dancing. (If you’ve already tried these things, you’re ahead of me!)
Brainstorm that bad boy. Think big or small to give you ideas, and…
Step 3: Do ‘em.
Sounds pretty obvious, right? As simple as this sounds, this step is easily the most difficult. But if you’re trying to be a more spontaneous person, but jumping up on a stage for some impromptu karaoke gives you the heebie-jeebies, maybe you have some work to do. (Or it’s not your thing, which is no big deal.) But the fact is, if you want a major change in your life, going about the same routine isn’t the way to do it.
Step out there, be that person! At first it might seem pretty awkward – after all, the point of many of those things being on your list is that they’re outside of your comfort zone. And scary, too – but that’s alright. But as you keep on entering marathons, taking merengue lessons and practicing French, you may find that it’s becoming closer and closer to second nature. Often times these things aren’t as scary as you think – and you may regret the things that you didn’t do more than what you actually did.